Think of online dating as a grand social experiment – exciting, filled with unlimited possibility, and occasionally baffling. A little etiquette goes a long way in ensuring you’re both a delightful virtual companion and significantly increase your chances of a second (or even a third!) date.
The Art of the Opening Salvo
- DO: Stand Out from the Generic Crowd. “Hey” and “What’s up?” are the online dating equivalent of elevator music. Show you took two seconds to look at their profile. Example: “Intrigued by your volunteer work. Animal shelter or food pantry? Always a sucker for a good cause.”
- DON’T: Be a Creepster Overly sexual comments or aggressive advances are guaranteed to land you in the digital trash bin faster than you say “wanna meet up?”. Wit and flirtation? Great. Sleezy one-liners? Hard Pass.
The Joy of the Conversational Tango
- DO: Ask Open-Ended Questions This is not a multiple-choice exam. “Do you like hiking?” is a dead end. Try, “Craziest or most scenic hike you’ve been on?” Invites stories and keeps it interesting.
- DON’T: Make it an Interview Rapid-fire questions feel intrusive. Balance questions with sharing tidbits about yourself too. It’s a conversation, not data collection.
- DO: Embrace the Art of Playful Banter Witty comebacks and gentle teasing (about their obsession with vintage video games, perhaps) create a spark that boring niceties never will.
- DON’T: Be a Negative Nancy Complaining about work, exes, or online dating in general is a major turnoff. Positivity is way more attractive!
The Ghosting Conundrum
- DO: Be Respectful When It’s Not a Fit. A simple “Thanks for chatting, but I don’t see a spark here” is kinder than disappearing into thin air.
- DON’T: Lead Them On. If you’re not interested, be clear, not wishy-washy. It’ll save them (and you!) future frustration.
From Swiping to IRL – The First Date
- DO: Offer an Easy First Date. Low-pressure is key! Coffee date, a short walk in the park, beats a three-hour marathon dinner where escape is tricky.
- DON’T: Be Cheap. Grabbing the check or at least splitting it shows you’re invested. Awkward haggling at the table is not a good look.
- DO: Put Your Phone Away Nothing kills a vibe faster than being ghosted while on an actual date.
- DON’T: Overshare or Complain. This is not therapy. Focus on light, engaging topics and see if there’s chemistry.
Table: Online Dating Etiquette Quick Checklist
| Do’s | Don’ts |
|---|---|
| Put effort into your messages. | Send generic one-liners. |
| Ask genuine questions. | Make everything about you, never them. |
| Compliment sparingly and sincerely. | Give unsolicited advice or criticism. |
| Be timely with responses (within reason). | Play hard to get or wait days to reply. |
| Use lighthearted humor. | Be overly serious or negative. |
Remember, It’s Not Rocket Science
Ultimately, good online dating etiquette boils down to simple respect, a splash of playfulness, and genuine curiosity about the person behind the profile. If you wouldn’t want someone to do it to you, don’t do it online either! Relax, try to have fun with the process, and let those good manners and your charming personality pave the way to making a great connection.
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